I will mention some calls I don’t want to forget, just for the sake of future parties I may go to.
One of my first memorable situations was the one in which this Dominican was impersonating Jesús Colomé. He called a bank and said he was Colomé and that he needed information about his credit card. The bank representative asked him to confirm his address (one of the most common identity verification questions) and he said: “I came to the Dominican Republic because the season is over.” “Yes, sir, but what is the address on the account?” “Well, I live in Florida, but I came to the Republic because the season is over.” The rep didn’t understand, which made me think he knew nothing about baseball. And “Jesús Colomé” coundn’t verify anything. He was outdoors, in some place ful of people, which added more to the confusion because he was hard to understand and he couldn’t hear us well either. And I could not say to the bank rep “Hey, he’s not the guy he’s saying he is”, because an interpreter only interprets languages, not situations. I can’t say something that has actually not been said, nothing can come from my own mouth and I can’t say what I “think”. We were beating around the bush for like 5 minutes, 4 and a half more than we should have. Finally, “Jesús Colomé” got tired and hung up.
More recently, a Mexican called a health insurance company. He wanted a gynecologist’s phone number in his area. Since there are several types of gynecologists, the rep asked him if he needed it because of a pregnancy situation. The Mexican answered: “No, it’s that we suspect our 14-year-old daughter is having sexual relations.” I was tempted to change at least one of the numbers the rep was giving out, but I didn’t dare.
Spanish-speakers sometimes call me stupid things like “niñita” (little girl) or “mi amor” (darling, love). Some speak over my own voice, when I have already started interpreting. Some reps call the attention of us both, like if I was part of the problem because I am also Hispanic. Others are very empathic, asking me to interpret things like “If you don’t shut up and let the interpreter talk I will hang up right now.” Now that I think about it, rude people who call to have a problem solved, well, I don’t know what they’re thinking of. Don’t they even suspect that there must be someone in the world who is not going to take crap from them? It’s like mistreating a waiter: you never do, or risk having your food spit on in the murky confines of the kitchen. When you ask for a service, you don’t scream or insult or act like if you had natural rights to the service, even if you do. When you deal with people and you want to be dealt with as people, you symbolically quit your rights and become humble. Or else.
One of my first memorable situations was the one in which this Dominican was impersonating Jesús Colomé. He called a bank and said he was Colomé and that he needed information about his credit card. The bank representative asked him to confirm his address (one of the most common identity verification questions) and he said: “I came to the Dominican Republic because the season is over.” “Yes, sir, but what is the address on the account?” “Well, I live in Florida, but I came to the Republic because the season is over.” The rep didn’t understand, which made me think he knew nothing about baseball. And “Jesús Colomé” coundn’t verify anything. He was outdoors, in some place ful of people, which added more to the confusion because he was hard to understand and he couldn’t hear us well either. And I could not say to the bank rep “Hey, he’s not the guy he’s saying he is”, because an interpreter only interprets languages, not situations. I can’t say something that has actually not been said, nothing can come from my own mouth and I can’t say what I “think”. We were beating around the bush for like 5 minutes, 4 and a half more than we should have. Finally, “Jesús Colomé” got tired and hung up.
More recently, a Mexican called a health insurance company. He wanted a gynecologist’s phone number in his area. Since there are several types of gynecologists, the rep asked him if he needed it because of a pregnancy situation. The Mexican answered: “No, it’s that we suspect our 14-year-old daughter is having sexual relations.” I was tempted to change at least one of the numbers the rep was giving out, but I didn’t dare.
Spanish-speakers sometimes call me stupid things like “niñita” (little girl) or “mi amor” (darling, love). Some speak over my own voice, when I have already started interpreting. Some reps call the attention of us both, like if I was part of the problem because I am also Hispanic. Others are very empathic, asking me to interpret things like “If you don’t shut up and let the interpreter talk I will hang up right now.” Now that I think about it, rude people who call to have a problem solved, well, I don’t know what they’re thinking of. Don’t they even suspect that there must be someone in the world who is not going to take crap from them? It’s like mistreating a waiter: you never do, or risk having your food spit on in the murky confines of the kitchen. When you ask for a service, you don’t scream or insult or act like if you had natural rights to the service, even if you do. When you deal with people and you want to be dealt with as people, you symbolically quit your rights and become humble. Or else.
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